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It’s the playoffs, baby. ‘Nuff said. Now it’s time to separate the boys from the men, the phonies from the Real McCoys and the superstars from the super chumps. Too many juicy match ups this year to overlook from a fan’s standpoint so let’s get down to business.

Eastern Conference

Indiana Pacers vs Chicago Bulls AKA No-See Television

Probably the worst series of all. In fact, I can’t see myself watching even one of these games since the Bulls should bitch-slap the Pacers all around the Windy City before sweeping them in Indiana. Then again, this is exactly what you get when allowing a team with a 37-45 regular season record into the playoffs.

4-0; Bulls Sweep

Philadelphia 76ers vs Miami Heat AKA America is Rooting for the Sixers

Now comes the start of the Bounce The Heat from the Playoffs Campaign, something everyone outside of Miami and their bandwagon is hoping for. Can Philly pull off the upset in round one? Nope. But they do have a slight chance if their defense plays out of this world, Andre Iguodala contains Lebron and Jrue Holliday is able to slice through Miami’s interior at will. However, all of that is doubtful as I don’t think Philly has enough talent, depth or shooting to handle Miami.

4-1; Miami moves on

New York Knicks vs Boston Celtics AKA The Beantown/Big Apple Brawl

If you don’t love this series, you’re not a basketball fan and shouldn’t even be reading this. At first glance, you’d have to pick the Celtics with their experience and defensive prowess. However, let’s be realistic here: This is NOT the same Boston team that played in two of the last three Finals. Losing Kendrick Perkins created a big crack in their team D and has them looking old and extremely vulnerable. Then again, my grandmother can defend better than New York. But, the Knicks have two superstars that can change a game, along with the crafty, heavily experienced Chauncey Billups at point guard, someone who can also be clutch when needed. This one is very tough to pick.

4-2; Boston wins in 6

Atlanta Hawks vs Orlando Magic AKA The “Don’t Forget About Us” Series

Two teams who people think are really good until they underachieve for most of the season only to wind up in the playoffs where neither will make it past the second round. Actually, that’s untrue. If the Hawks get past Orlando, they’ll get demolished by the Bulls. However, if the Magic move on, I think they present Chicago with more issues than people give them credit for. Who will guard Dwight Howard in the paint? Yes, Orlando underachieved this year but this is the playoffs, and let’s not forget that this team is still filled with great shooters, a strength that can get you far in the post season.

4-2; Orlando gets it done in 6

Western Conference

Memphis Grizzlies vs San Antonio Spurs AKA The “Memphis Might Win” Series

Well, according to the experts, the Grizzlies apparently have a strong chance at upsetting the Spurs here in the first round. I say that’s a bunch of bullshit. Let’s be honest. the Spurs have Tim Duncan, Tony Parker, Manu Ginobili and tons of depth and experience. Yes, the Grizz have Zach Randolph and a good young core of talented guys but I’m not buying the upset at all. There’s this guy on San Antonio’s bench named Greg Popovich that’s pretty good at coaching. Upset my ass.

4-1; San Antonio moves on

New Orleans Hornets vs Los Angeles Lakers AKA The “We Miss David West” Series

The Hornets have Chris Paul and…oh, that’s right, NO ONE ELSE! Their second best player and leading scorer, David West, tore his ACL a few weeks ago so he’s out even though it wouldn’t have mattered much had he been involved here. The Lakers, Andrew Bynum or not, will manhandle New Orleans because they’re too big, too deep and too good. L.A. also knows how to focus in the post season so they should be ready to three-peat.

4-0; Lakers sweep

Portland Trailblazers vs Dallas Mavericks AKA Rip City Meets The Softies

No team in these playoffs plays the cream puff role quite as well as the Dallas Mavericks who have about as much toughness as Richard Simmons on the basketball court. Sure, Jason Terry can talk all he wants but he’ll be in for a rude awakening against a rugged, defensive-oriented team like the Trailblazers who will be intent on upsetting Dallas for a second round match up with L.A. Dirk will have his say and score a ton of points but I don’t think it will be enough.

4-2; Portland advances

Denver Nuggets vs Oklahoma City Thunder AKA Mile High Mania vs Thunderstruck

Did your eyes light up at this match up? I know fans of the game love this series already and they haven’t even played yet. By the way, has any team in the history of the NBA ever played as well as Denver did after trading a superstar away? I can’t remember any. OKC has been awesome this season and stole Kendrick Perkins away from Boston for the amazingly talented Nenad Krystic and Jeff Green (yep, that’s sarcasm, folks). So what we have here is a rambunctious, team-first group in the Nuggets going against an extremely talented bunch in the Thunder who will try to fend off their first round with their two deadliest weapons: Kevin Durant and Russell Westbrook. Should be fun.

4-2; Denver shocks everyone to move on

Enjoy the first round, everybody. I’ll be back in a few weeks for second round predictions.

Tags: Atlanta Hawks, Boston Celtics, Chicago Bulls, Dallas Mavericks, Denver Nuggets, Indiana Pacers, Los Angeles Lakers, Memphis Grizzlies, Miami Heat, NBA Playoffs, New Orleans Hornets, New York Knicks, Oklahoma City Thunder, Orlando Magic, Philadelphia 76ers, Portland Trailblazers, San Antonio Spurs
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